Okay so this is all kinda important stuff. To make sure I work hard enough to do what I actually want in life, the following must be kept conscious.
There is self-belief, desire, motivation, expectation, potential, chance, opportunity, choice and task. Not a single one of these things means anything unless I act upon it. Having more potential or less chance than the next prospective medic will not count for anything if I don't remind myself that without acting, without actively taking positive steps to achieve (both academically and in life), all of what could be will go to waste. I should remind myself that if I do let this happen, I could well wake up in ten years time and hate myself. I could let down everyone who bought into believing in me, I could let down my parents and my friends. Their support is nothing if I do not act. I could let myself down. This will happen if I expect the work to be done for me purely because I know I can.
Sacrifices will be made, not only on my behalf either. My parents will put up with me for two more years, and all my petty bullshit. They will have to put up with my lazyness, and my selfishness. They know as well as me however, that now is the time for me to be selfish. One does not enjoy this, but needs must. I will sacrifice my social life, some people won't understand. I will sacrifice time with my girlfriend, she will always understand.
Even writing this all down now, means absolutely nothing if I don't believe a word I'm saying. If this is all for dramatic effect or for some deluded elitist position I have upon writing down what I think people want to read, then it to means nothing.
Actions > Words. I'm so tired of words.
Messy
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